Snapchat reportedly rejected a buyout offer from Facebook. Here's an exclusive look at how it went down:

Facebook's five top lawyers smirk as they slide a slip of heavy-weight paper across a walnut boardroom table.

Overachieving 23-year-old Snapchat co-founder and CEO Evan Spiegel leans forward, picks the paper up and casually unfolds it. There's a pause and all the carefully temperature-controlled air seems to go out of the room.

Spiegel snorts quietly, stands up, buttons his smart-casual sports jacket the way he's seen lawyers do it on TV and strides through the heavy double doors, tossing the paper over his left shoulder as he goes.

The paper flutters down to the varnished table and the number on it slowly comes into focus: $3,000,000,000 neatly printed in black ink, each zero a smiling ghost.

As the slip comes to rest, it bursts into a bright flame - just for a second - and then whoosh. It's gone.

The lawyers shift uncomfortably in their pressed Tom Ford suits. Zuckerberg is not going to like this.

More blips

And now for other technology news stories represented in the style of bad teleplays: