"Seven days was all she wrote," sang Sting and/or the Police, but due to a scheduling snafu and a very, very secret Logitech gaming peripheral (take a rough guess) it's actually nine days since we last delved into the world of the wide web.

But we're nothing if not fair here on TechRadar, and although we could never hope to be as cutting edge and downright confusing as the 7 days in Mobile (those crazy kids), as a peace offering we are prepared to give you a whole new raft of fun segments and a round up of the news that is SO satirical we took nearly all of the jokes out.

Stuff that happened

Here's proof that we don't need broad comedy strokes in '7dotI': a story with the word Kangaroo in it and we're refusing to jump on the obvious gags. Anyway, that pesky Competition Commission made its feelings known on the Online TV 300 pound gorilla that was Project Kangaroo – featuring the likes of BBC, ITV and Channel 4.

Apparently if all of the major broadcasters gang up then they could not only dominate the VOD playground but probably steal everyone else's lunch money as well, the big bullies. So a bounce back to the drawing board for PK; wonder if they have anything else in their pouch…sorry.

Meanwhile, with one out of three of its big rivals wallowing in marsupial hell, Sky made its own programming fare available to those who don't like satellite dished but love the internet. Now you can watch the likes of Premiership football for an online fee rather than having to wait for people to come and drill through your wall, upset your neighbours and miss their generous day long installation spot with no hint of an apology.

The internet is, as we all know, the most important repository of information ever in the whole world of all time since the dawn of humanity etc etc. Which is why we all think that it is simply awesome that one of the most asked questions (according to Ask) is 'Who is the Stig?' in reference to the masked driver on Top Gear. A few questions that we were surprised didn't make the list were 'where the hell did Jeeves go?' and 'Is it true that Jeeves is now a porn star?'

And according to ComScore a quarter of the UK is now using mobile internet. Obviously this brings some inherent dangers so if you could look up right about ….now. Then you'll avoid that upcoming lamp-post.

Worst phrase of the week: Facemail day

We got a press release suggesting that email is making personal relationships deteriorate. The answer? A 'facemail day'. Meaning – go and talk to people. We're going to stick with the word 'conversation' thanks.


Five Penny-Arcade cartoons that we love

http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2003/06/30/
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2004/03/19/
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/04/09/
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2005/12/16/
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2008/11/24/


Five things we learned from YouTube this week

What the tenth dimension looks like
That Britney Spears is the worst lipsyncher ever
That Half Life fans make awesome trailers, the Black Mesa trailer rocks
That Bruce Lee is really good at table tennis
That white dogs can't jump

Five sites that used to be much better

Aintitcool – Welcome to the modern web cycle. Underground site becomes a cult hit because it breaks all the rules. Site becomes massive due to internet buzz. Industry embraces website and main figures become minor celebrities. Main figures start not wanting to upset their new friends. Revenue streams and advertising becomes more important than exclusives. Site becomes mainstream.