LG Lotus 'phone scarf' signals end of civilisation

We'll get to you next time, Canon....
We'll get to you next time, Canon....

If there's one group of people more obsessed with shiny, new things than techno nerds, it's fashionistas. But from 'Beauty and the Geek' to the Siemens Xelibri, the clashing of these two particular cultures rarely produces anything worthwhile.

And so the omens weren't good for LG's new Lotus handset, launched yesterday during New York Fashion Week. Considered on its own, this Qwerty clamshell phone didn't sound too bad: 2.4-inch display, threaded SMS, built-in GPS, external MP3 controls, stereo Bluetooth and a 2MP camera.

But when Christian Siriano from series four of 'Project Runway' unveiled a 'one of a kind' (let's hope so) scarf he's designed for the Lotus, any credibility it had evaporated faster than an LG Prada's resale value.

Fashion victim... if only

The reality TV show "winner" (let's face it, we're all losers here) only made matters worse by gushing: ""The scarf I designed for the new LG Lotus is fabulous. It has a pocket for another accessory I can't live or work without – my phone! I designed the scarf's little pocket for the Lotus' square shape."

Well done, Christian. The phone scarf. I would say that right here we've seen the absolute nadir of high tech product marketing (and possibly Western civilisation), but it appears there is still a full eight hours of Fashion Week yet to run.

You can experience the full horror of the Lotus at www.lglotus.com. If you decide not to emigrate immediately to an isolated Tibetan monastery, you can even buy a Lotus in October, exclusively from Sprint stores in the US.

I'll let Christian Siriano have the last word: "I love the Lotus! You should too."

Mark Harris is Senior Research Director at Gartner.