If you thought the world of consumer technology was getting boring, events this week should have changed your mind. Hackers have been bashing away trying to crack the Apple iPhone; Nintendo, Microsoft and Sony have been taking cheap shots at each other with jibes about food poisoning and poor strategies; and an old lady went and got herself the fastest internet connection in the world.
Check out the week's hottest news, gossip and comment:
75-year-old pensioner has fastest broadband
It's amazing the kind of whacky stories that some people get excited about. This story was actually written last Friday but it's still been the number one story on Tech.co.uk every day for the last week. You've been reading it in your tens of thousands.
The basic story is this: a 75-year-old Swedish granny has been set up with fastest broadband connection in the world of all time ever. Sigbritt Lothberg enjoys a massive 40Gbps connection - many thousand times faster than the average connection speed. That's not fair, is it?
Nintendo Wii to become greatest of all time
Apparently, the Nintendo Wii games console could eventually outsell the Sony PlayStation 2 to become the greatest games console of all time. That's according to Nintendo president Satoru Iwata, who thinks that the Wii's new approach to gaming could change the industry forever.
Sony man says Xbox 360 'doesn't even work'
In a bizarre outburst, Sony VP of marketing, Peter Dillie said that the Microsoft Xbox 360 console does not work and will not last anywhere near as long as the Sony PlayStation 3. Does he have a point? Have a read and decide for yourself.
Hackers still can't crack iPhone unlock
Predictably the iPhone news wagon is still bumbling along happily, and no one seems to have got bored of it yet. Apparently, hacking the Apple iPhone so it can be used on any mobile network is more proving more difficult than expected. The situation is causing red faces among hackers who said they'd crack the iPhone in a week - oops!
40Gbps broadband granny has £125K of kit
Yup, apparently the Swedish granny with the 40Gbps internet connection is also the proud owner of £125,000-worth of hardware to enable the connection. And she didn't pay a penny for it either, it was all a gift from her son. Luckiest granny alive? We'd have preferred vouchers...
Intel Core 2 Extreme laptop reaches 3GHz
Of interest to hardcore computing fans will be the news that Intel has introduced its first long-awaited Extreme Edition mobile processor - and it's already been overclocked. The standard Core 2 Extreme X7800 boasts 2.66 GHz across its dual-cores, with 4MB of shared L2 cache.
Schoolgirl stabbed over row on Bebo website
That's right, an argument on social networking site Bebo spilled over into the schoolyard and ended up with a 13-year old girl being stabbed with a kitchen knife. If you thought that this kind of thing only happens in America, you were wrong!
Apple iPhone exceeds sales expectations
More iPhone news: it seems that Apple shifted so many iPhones in its opening weekend that one analyst has had to keep revising his total sale predictions upwards ahead of Apple's Q1 results. The latest numbers from Piper Jaffray show that Apple sold 500,000 iPhones in just two days. Phwar!
Sony PS3 failing in Japan, says Microsoft
In an extremely out of character move, Microsoft Gaming chief, Liverpudlian Peter Moore, sensationally suggested that Sony's PlayStation 3 strategy is "failing" in its homeland Japan. "You can bet that Sony built a long-term business plan about being successful in Japan and that business plan is crumbling" he said. It seemed off that Moore would suddenly say such a thing, but then the next day...