After months of leaked images and poster reveals, Paramount Pictures has finally released the first official trailer for its upcoming Sonic the Hedgehog movie, and boy, it won't do much to dispel fans' fears.
- Ryan Reynolds is perfect as Detective Pikachu in new Pokémon trailer
- Original Sonic the Hedgehog available for Nintendo Switch in collection
- The Sega Genesis Mini gets a release date and a price
The most obviously worrying element is the film's grotesque Sonic design, which inexplicably aims for a modicum of bizarre realism (wtf is with his very human teeth?) while still looking to keep its titular character cartoonish, leading to an end result that seems more like an off-brand 'blue hedgehog' Halloween costume than it does Sega's beloved mascot.
Next, we have a baffling story that sees Sonic (voiced by Ben Schwartz) attempting to save Earth from the evil Dr. Robotnik (Jim Carrey), who plans to capture our speedy blue protagonist and use his powers to take over the world (leading us to wonder why Sonic is on our planet in the first place).
To do this, Sonic must team up with a cop (Westworld's James Marsden) from the rural town of Green Hill (as in Green Hill Zone, get it?), presumedly leading to hilarious* hijinx and misadventures.
Bewilderingly scored to Coolio's 'Gangsta's Paradise', the trailer features numerous attempts at comedy, only one of which actually lands in any capacity (bold choice to go with a kidnapping joke in a kids movie). Surprisingly, comedy legend Jim Carrey proves to be the least funny of them all.
You can check out the full trailer for Sonic the Hedgehog at your peril below, and then avoid anything even remotely resembling a movie theater when the film releases on November 8, 2019.
*Hilarity not guaranteed.