There's been so much happening this week that we've been moved to rhyme. We discovered that the Galaxy S3 is perfect for stalking, New Jersey's banned people texting while walking, we've seen new phones from ZTE and LG and the Beeb says we'll all get Olympics in HD.
iPhone 5 rumours are awfully trendy, Samsung's screens are going all bendy, Sony's got new lenses and a new camera too, Facebook fraud was a blunder by Yahoo. Lenovo's new ultrabook is awfully thin, and we test the HP Envy to see if it will win.
Okay, we'll stop now — which is what we hope Samsung will do with its creepy ads for the Galaxy S3. According to Kate Solomon it ""shares what's in your heart", "keeps track of loved ones", "recognises who you are" and "waits till you're asleep". "Before what, Samsung?" she types in terror. "BEFORE WHAT?"
Meanwhile in America, a New Jersey town has responded to the menace of people walking and texting simultaneously by digging bear traps in sidewalks and covering lamposts and other street furniture in broken glass. Not really, but it has introduced $85 fines for the offence. It's no joke: as Scott Nichols reports, the town in question, Fort Lee, has "suffered three fatal texting accidents so far this year".
When it comes to testing phones we prefer to stay in the office rather than walk under buses, and this week we've looked at loads of new devices including the ZTE Tania Windows Phone, which is pretty good, and the LG Optimus L3 Android phone, which isn't.
Still, you'll be able to use it to watch the Olympics, which the BBC promises to stream in up to 24 channels of glorious HD via phone, tablet and mobile device apps. You'll even be able to watch it on TV!
We're hardly into summer time and already tech watcher's thoughts are turning to autumn, when the iPhone 5 is due to appear. With months to go the rumour factory's throwing out all kinds of ideas, but the rumours of a bigger screen are becoming deafening — and they've reached the Wall Street Journal, Apple's favourite leak-receiver. You just know that "sources familiar with the situation" work for a firm whose name begins with A. And we don't mean Argos.
Could the iPhone 5 have a bendy screen? We very much doubt it, but screen supplier Samsung says it's received "huge" orders for its bendy OLED displays, which it'll be manufacturing in bulk from the second half of this year. A bendy iPhone isn't out of the question, but we think it's still some way off.
Remember Sony, the Apple of the 70s and 80s? It's still going, we're told, and its camera division has unveiled some tasty new kit. There's the new Sony NEX-F3 compact system camera, a new DSLT (Digital Single Lens Translucent) called the Sony Alpha a37, and a bunch of new lenses for both NEX and A-mount cameras.
There's been lots of red hot ultrabook action this week, with Lenovo launching the super-thin and super-desirable Thinkpad X1 Carbon and HP letting us get up close and personal with the HP Envy 6. Our man Dan Grabham was impressed, suggesting that "these will be among the very best value Ultrabooks on the market when they go on sale".
Last but not least, the patent wars between rival tech firms continued in all their tedium this week — but Yahoo livened things up with an almighty cock-up when it wrongly accused Facebook of fraud. To be honest, we're only including it in Week in Tech so we can say YAHOOPS!
